For the past couple of weeks I have been tired and hungrier than normal. I kept telling myself that it was just because we were in the thick of school/preschool/fall activities. I hardly ever eat breakfast, but was eating breakfast every morning, either cereal (frosted shredded mini wheats) or a Breakfast Jack. And my boobs had been sore. I was convinced my hormones were just working and this was normal PMS (which I don't typically have, due to my strange body). So much so that when I went for my annual (Oct. 15) at my OB/GYN, I asked him to check my progesterone level to see if it indicated ovulation because I wanted to see if I was right about my hormones actually working properly.
A week and a half went by and I still hadn't heard back from the doctor with my results. I called the nurse and she called me back later that day. She said my progesterone level was 19, which definitely indicated ovulation. Anything over 5 or 6 indicates ovulation, so she said that was a great number. She also told me to take a pregnancy test within a couple of days if I hadn't started yet. I kind of blew her off because so many months I would test and it would come back negative because my cycles are just so wacky. But this time I really did need to test. I was scheduled for a mammogram the following Friday and needed to know for sure before going in for the appointment. I dreaded taking the test. I didn't want to see the negative. I considered just canceling the appointment altogether and just waiting for my period to start so I wouldn't have to be disappointed that morning.
When I did decide to take the test Friday morning (Oct. 26--after dropping Logan off at school), I left it on the bathroom counter for probably an hour. I went back to the couch to take a nap. My sister and husband both called, wondering if I had tested yet. I told them both no, not wanting the pressure. I decided to move my nap to the bedroom and just figured I would check the test before laying back down.
I glanced at the test stick and immediately lost my breath. PREGNANT. In actual words--this was a fancy digital test.
I was so used to seeing NOT PREGNANT, that I kept double checking. I immediately called my husband and I don't think I could speak. But he knew. I was beside myself, crying, screaming, smiling, laughing. I don't know that we even had a conversation. I don't even remember hanging up with him. I tried to call my sister but she didn't answer her phone. Seriously. So I called my best friend, Lindsey, knowing she was at work but hoping she would have her phone with her. Nope. So I texted her to call me ASAP. I called my sister again and this time she answered (after 4 rings!). I still couldn't talk, other than "um...so...well..." but she caught on. "Is it positive?! Are you?!" She was with 2 of her (our) friends at IKEA so they were all squealing in the background. Again, I couldn't really speak. Not sure of what we even said but I was shaking in disbelief. We eventually hung up and I tried to catch my breath again.
I called to cancel my mammogram appointment and then called my OB/GYN to see if I could come in for bloodwork to verify. I just wanted to make sure it was accurate due to my body's strange ways. They could get me in within a couple hours. I attempted to rest a bit more (yeah, right) and then hopped in the shower and went to the doctor. The blood draw took no time at all and I saw the doctor in the hallway on my way to check out. We talked about my meds and my sonogram appointment (Nov. 5). Then he said "Well, we don't know anything until we hear the heartbeat." Womp, womp. Wow. Way to bring me down. From then on, I was worried about not maintaining the pregnancy. Not that I have had that problem before, but it is still a very real concern.
I met my sister and her friends for lunch at Cheesecake Factory, where we ate and talked and laughed and planned. I think I was in shock for several days after that and it still doesn't feel completely real to me.
Stay tuned for more exciting news! I plan on using this blog as my journal for this pregnancy--I didn't have this when I was pregnant with Logan so I want to remember everything this time!
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